Tomorrow

 

So tomorrow is the big day!  I got the call today that my surgery was originally scheduled for 1:45pm!!!  Are you kidding me???  That's crazy I can't eat after midnight.  I am going to be so hangry!  After much panic and a few tears I got a call saying that they had changed my appointment time and I will be going in right after my ct scan.  Thank goodness.  

I am not going to lie I have had a wave of emotions this week.  I have been anxious, scared, nervous, thankful, a wreck in general.  My poor family has been dealing with the mood swings while I process what is happening here.  

I've gotten a lot of questions...so I'll try and answer them.  

I have no idea how long I will be in the hospital.  The doctor mentioned 1-2 days.  The nurse mentioned 3-4.  It all depends on how I am doing after.  I know I need to get up, have my pain under control, be eating and going to the bathroom.  The fast I can do those the faster they will spring me.  I have told myself that I will be there until at least Sunday if not Monday.  This way I won't get discouraged when I am not out of there on Saturday. lol. 

My friends have graciously set up a meal train for us.  I anticipate that the first couple of days are going to be the roughest and that I will have a headache and need to rest.  Meals are incredibly helpful especially with two growing boys!   

We are trying to keep things as normal as possible for the boys. My mom and sister will take me, Bryan will get the kids ready for school and onto the bus, go to work and then be with them that night.  

We are all handling this as well as can be expected.   With the spinal tap came the realization that I also had cancer cells in my spinal fluid.  This came as a shock to most everyone involved in my care because my scans have been stable and good.  I talked in great length with my oncologist, Bryan and my mom and sisters.  I had several options to fight this and I am taking the less obtrusive one.  We know that my current medication can still kill of these pesky cells and that's what we are trying.  I didn't want to start chemo or another infusion and then not have it in my bag of tricks when I have a tumor pop up.  Right not there is nothing to biopsy so we don't know if there is any change to my mutation.  My scans will be closely monitored (not that they weren't before) but any ache or pain or anything different I will get in for a scan to make sure there isn't a tumor popping up.  

I am confident in my doctors and my plan of attack, although worried about the exhaustion that comes with increasing my medications.  I know that I have some of the best doctors in my corner and fighting for me.  

So tomorrow morning I will put my trust in a doctor that I just met.  I will take a nice little nap and come out of surgery with a sore throat and most likely a headache.  But then I will be as good as new!